Steers is dead to me

It is surprisingly filthy, infested by cockroaches and a consistently bad paint job. It's been a minute since it had those pack-'em-in offers on Wednesday that filled the joint with college kids out looking for a bargain on fast food. You can tell that the place is definitely over the hill - the hot waitresses that used to lure in the aforementioned college types (and their dads) are long gone, lured to KFC and Pizza Hut. What was once a rather nice burger joint that sometimes served really nice fried chicken is now a pale shadow of its former glory, infested by roaches and a staff that looks like it wishes it were working at KFC. Or Pizza Hut. Or Java.

Steers Wabera Street used to pack them in. No more. On an average day, you question the wisdom of keeping the upstairs section; the place is never packed. The fare, Jesoh! It's as if someone sucked the soul out of the kitchen staff and replaced it with the menacing, dark-hearted malevolence of Voldemort. Or Severus Snape. Or both.

One thing fast food joints have going for them is consistency. Once that goes, there go the customers. We are pretty easy to satisfy: just serve us the same heart-attack inducing oversalted bitts of beef, cheese, lettuce and tomatoes stuck between two buns and we are good. So long as the burger tastes exactly as it did last week we won't be thinking of looking to some pricey alternative like Java (whose burgers are nothing to write home about). But once your quality starts to slide, once we get the feeling that the beef patty might have been at risk of going all mouldy and shit, we are done. Roaches are just the final sign that Beelzebub has taken the wheel and your establishment is fast careening towards a cliff.

I am not going back. This will probably break Lulu's heart more than mine; after all, she's in college, broke and knows that I am the only reliable soft-touch should she wish to avoid the predictable consistency of Sonford Fish and Chips. Steers Wabera Street is no longer a place you should ever bother visiting. If your still crave a King Steers Burger, try Steers Kenyatta Avenue or Steers Muindi Mbingu Street; they are slightly cleaner, and the Steers consistency hasn't been snuffed out yet.