Wednesday, October 26, 2005

of conventions and bitches

"She has a lot of sleeping around to do if she wants to attend the next COP". And that statement says it all about the state of affairs at the seventh session of the Conference of theParties to the UN Convention to Combat Desertification (UNCCD). You must have met one of those pushy women who use whatever wiles they think they got to wangle a few plum jobs here and there and favours galore. They tend to rub you the wrong way, especially when you'd like to think of yourself as a straight arrow with few enemies in the world.

Boy was I wrong. Being a goody-two-shoes is not a good thing 'cos people think they can walk all over your arse and get away with it 'cos you ain't got the stones to fight back. Boy did she get it wrong. I am lawyer and we are a mean-arsed bunch. We hate people who think they know more than us and we will crucify you when we get the chance.

I am delegate at this conference and I'm getting paid to be here. So when some bitch decides to meddle when I am about to get paid, I get pissed. I stand my ground and point out that she ain't the paymaster and she can go fuck herself. Of course she has it in for me for some reason. I keep outta her way as much as possibe, but she keeps trying to meddle in my affairs, even so far as going to lie that she has the authority to bar me from certain meets. I hope she's having nightmares cos I am 2 on 2 over her skinny little ass on ugly legs. I am in the meets she doesn't want me to attend.

And now she's getting herself an army. I am prolific commentator at this COP. I write daily for the ECO and now there are murmerings that I am getting too much exposure. Those other arseholes don't wanna write and now they are pissed that I do so every single fuckin' day. Screw 'em. I ain't their keeper. They gotta problem with me, they'd better tell it to the man or put pen to paper and stop whining. I ain't asking them for permission and I ain't apologising. They got problems, well I got some of my own and so I can't take time outta my busy schedule to hold their hands across this road. Fuck 'em all!

As by law established

The members of my profession, the ones with a pompous sense of importance, tend to use phrases whose value has diminished greatly since the ...