Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Don't mess with the king, Mr Ruto.

I don't Miss JJ Kamotho any more. I vaguely remember Sharaif Nassir, so I don't miss him at all. For a minute I thought that Mike Sonko was The One, but then he went into that whole Rachel Shebesh thing and we all lost our collective interest in him. For a time Jakoyo Midiwo and Otieno Kajwang' seemed like they could be The One, but Mr Midiwo lacks panache and the legal fraternity still has a less than friendly opinion of Mr Kajwang'. But the gods of Kenya's politics smiled on us. They rewarded us for our patience. They have bequeathed on us the spiritual successor to JJ Kamotho and Sharif Nassir. All hail the rise of Aden Bare Duale, Leader of the Majority Party in the National Assembly, Member for Garissa Township (United Republican Party) and scourge of all rebellious Jubilee governors.

On Monday, the fifteenth, Mr Duale brought his A Game; attending something to celebrate the Maasai Mara, in the presence of the Deputy President, the Governors of Narok and Bomet and a visiting delegation from Tanzania, Mr Duale, as some wildly descriptive members of the Fourth Estate reported the affair, frothed at the mouth as he caviled with wild abandon at the Governor of Bomet, Isaac Ruto. Mr Duale brought his limited, but rapidly improving, oratorical skills and troublesome and troubling Swahili to bear in a tour de force that Mr Ruto from Bomet will not soon forget. Mr Duale reminded us, for many of us have forgotten, that loyalty to the king must be demonstrated and demonstrated with passion. Mr Kamotho must be chuckling to himself in satisfaction, Mr Nassir must be resting easy for his banner has been passed on to one worthy of his skills.

On Monday Mr Duale reminded Mr Ruto from Bomet that being the Big Fish in a Small Pond in one of the nation's rural backwaters was a perilous situation; every now and then a Bigger Fish will be introduced into the pond to control other predators. The results are sometimes quite disastrous for the erstwhile Big Fish. Mr Ruto from Bomet has been introduced to the political iteration of Newton's Third Law of Motion. Mr Duale was the proxy for the Deputy President and the President. On Monday My Duale cemented his place in the king's court; he proved his loyalty and he did it in style.

Mr Ruto from Bomet is scrambling to counter the verbal semi-trailer that ran over him on Monday. He is busily organising groups of sniffy miffed wazees to give press interviews decrying the unwarranted attack by Mr Duale. It is not working. If it had been a playground fight in Jericho's Rabai Road Primary School, Mr Duale would be First Body and Mr Ruto from Bomet would be the kid from Buru who's ass had been well and truly handed to him. What Mr Ruto from Bomet doesn't need to organise press interviews and shit like that; he needs to take the fight to the President and the Deputy President; they are the only ones who count in this War of the Referendum. Mr Duale is merely a foot-soldier in the service of the king. His destruction is neither here nor there. He is of no consequence.

In politics, as in football, everyone must learn to play in his position. Mr Duale knows his position; he is not the Mario Balotelli of the Jubilee Alliance. That position goes to the king. He has just reminded Mr Ruto from Bomet that Mr Ruto too must play in his position. He may be the chairman of the club of governors, but that doesn't mean anything unless the king says it does. If he wants more money for the counties, it is not the people who are going to give it to him, as Mr Duale reminded him. It is the law. And the law is made in Parliament. And Parliament will do the king's bidding. Therefore, Mr Ruto from Bomet must go, hat in hand, with his begging bowl to the king. He must curtsy, genuflect and pay obeisance. If he does not, the next time Mr Duale sets off on him, he might not hold back. It will be a case of out of the frying pan and into the blast furnace of presidential umbrage. At that time, what Mr Ruto from Bomet considered a rock-hard certainty of his place in the Bomet political firmament may turn out to have been a figment of his imagination.

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